Algo!! Does Amsterdam

I realize that Algo is a pretty bad-ass name. That’s cause my parents knew when they named me that everything I do would be bad-ass, including my amazing trip to Amsterdam. It’s the reason I sign my name with TWO exclamation points instead of one like my lame-ass friend Kevin!.

Did I mention my bad-ass trip to Amsterdam? I’m not really good with words, so let me DRAW it for you. Cause I’m a bad-ass artist. You’ll get a better feeling for the trip that way. And then you’ll understand how f-ing awesome the whole thing was.

There were all these buildings right in a row – like right on f-ing top of each other. And they had all these windows that you could see in cause the hookers left the lights on. And you could see people smoking weed and hanging out with hookers. RIGHT THROUGH THE WINDOW. It was so bad-ass. I mean – I totally would’ve got a hooker if that jackass hadn’t stolen my traveler’s checks that my grandma got me for my trip.

And I totally would’ve smoked weed, cause it’s legal there. But one time at home, I tried weed and it made me feel kinda sick the next day. There must’ve been something wrong with the weed that the dopey kid from next door brought me. He’s such a lame-ass. I bet he doesn’t even know what good weed is. But I totally do. Cause I live on the edge. I don’t follow anyone’s rules. That’s why people in Amsterdam thought I was like a local and shit. They couldn’t even tell I’m from Ohio – and I know that’s true cause they weren’t speaking American to me – they were speaking Amsterdamish like I’m an f-ing LOCAL and shit.

Anyway – there are also some fences and some water and shit in Amsterdam. I didn’t go swimming or nothing cause I don’t like to take my shirt off in front of other people. But it’s the most bad-ass city I’ve ever been in in my whole life. My friends are all so jealous cause of the hookers and weed and shit. I gotta run cause my mom needs me to take my baby sister to the park. I bet there’s some hot ass milf bitches there and they don’t even know what’s coming to them. Algo!!